I’ve been thinking quite a lot since first reading the writers challenge on the daily press. It was something to the effect of an origin story on how you became a writer. I don’t actually consider myself a writer, just a girl with a laptop and too much time on her hands, so I thought it’d be improper to try that out. It did get me thinking of my beginnings as something I most definitely associate with, being mentally ill.
If my mental illness was a super hero secret identity of mine I’d be probably be insecure girl. Insecure girl, able to take your words and twist them into horrible slights directed solely at herself..in a single bound! The first time I can remember these amazing super powers surfacing was in elementary school. I remember being seven or eight and being remarkably paranoid, you know just slightly more paranoid than any other normal seven year old. It was extraordinary how quickly I could convince my underdeveloped mind that every other person in my classroom hated me and was quietly plotting against me. All super heroes need to have an arch enemy, mine just happened to be my entire second grade class. I have not so fond memories of angry outbursts and frenzied whispers to myself that I would leave all these awful people behind and change schools.
I never did change schools. In fact I stayed in the same school from kindergarten until my senior year of high school with roughly the same people I called my villains. Along the way my alter ego came out quite a lot. I barely had time to hop into a telephone booth and put on a costume before I was carelessly accusing friends of devising some sinister plot against me. Every one was a suspect and nobody was save from my wrath. When my chummy alter ego appeared I lost friends, I started meaningless fights, I cried in bathrooms and cut myself with the metal linings of pencil erasers. My kryptonite was everything and there was no telling when I’d change forms.
So there it is, the origin of my super awesome super power, being mentally ill! My dysfunctional powers include, but are not limited to:
The ability to make everything about myself!
The self esteem of a wet noodle!
The ability to cry and plead for forgiveness after spitting venomous insults only thirty seconds prior!
Amazing vision that only see’s the world in black and white, it’s really useful because everything is either all good or all bad. I don’t have to worry about that useless in between stuff!
A super cool and effective side kick that takes the form of a voice inside my head that constantly tells me why I’ll never be good enough!